Becoming

"I have finished the studies suggested, and practiced the routines, and memorized the verses and Words that one must recite to draw forth the healing powers. However, none of my attempts have met with success."

Kayliss nodded sadly. "Feenix, you are an excellent student. However, has it ever occurred to you that your destiny might not reside within our order?

"You have a talent, young man. Go forth and discover it. I alone cannot help you. I now release you from your bond of apprenticeship. You may do as you please."

At once, I felt surprised and betrayed by the kind old man, and yet I felt relieved. I could not simply sit still now; I must find exactly what my talent is and who can teach me the methods of using it.

"An old friend of mine has been searching for an apprentice... his avenue of magic is different but can still be used to aid the forces of good." The old priest rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "I will send word to him, that I have found one with talent he might better understand than I."

He smiled. "He will observe you, and will make himself known if he chooses. It may take him many years to decide, so do not be worried. Until he chooses, and to give you a task so that you may prove your worth, I have something that you might do. There is also a reward for this."I blinked; still not fully comprehending that I was no longer bound to the church. After that first shock, I was being offered employment, of a sort at least, which is a rarity."Near here there is a temple to an ancient power. Within it is a single artifact of divine power. Seek out this artifact, and I can provide you with certain holy relics."

"How will I know if I have the right thing? What if there are other artifacts, as well?"

"You will be rewarded well for anything else you return with. As for being certain you have the right object, you must determine that for yourself or return it to me. Oh, and it might be many days of hard travel away, the maps which show it's location are in relation to unknown cities and the scale of these maps is uncertain. The old texts refer to a "pulling" towards the temple. Here, this is what we have pieced together from the maps." He pulled a piece of parchment from his desk. "It was compiled from dozens of scraps, but we aren't certain if the scale remained the same throughout."

"We're not sure what these symbols stand for exactly, the words used to describe them can be roughly translated as 'crossovers' or 'bridges'. The lines must be some kind of roads between them. If you need anything, just let me or one of the acolytes know."

I concentrated on these 'bridges' for a moment. If it were a temple of immense power, it would need to get that power from somewhere. Divine power came only as a gift from the gods, but it was also known that certain locations had inherent power, and it is on these places that most temples are built. "Have there been other temples of the same faith discovered in the past?"

"I was just checking it a few minutes before you entered, actually. Here." He handed a map with the locations of these temples, and of a few cities. Also it showed the location relative to the temple. "Some of our researchers have scoured the area, but we have found nothing that seems correspond to the lines on the map. Also, none of our men have ever felt any sensation of divine energy that they should, if it were in that area."

"I will be travelling to this region in the morning, Father. It appears to be no more than a day's walk away. I could get there in a few hours with a good horse."

"There will be a horse readied in the morning. I suggest you get some sleep now, you'll be needing it."

I tried to take his advice. I have been trying to sleep for the past three hours. My mind constantly wandered. I had been removed from apprenticeship, which was both a blessing in itself and a problem. Everyone would be wondering why, and making stories and starting rumors. On the other hand, I had not really wanted to be in the priesthood, but it seemed the only way to both be successful and avoid my parents' plans for my future. At least as a priest, I thought, I would have the chance to help people rather than exploit them. Treating flesh-and-blood men and women as numbers, or animals has simply never sat well with me.

Again, I digress. Back to the reason I have started to write this. It is, in part, an explanation of the actual events. It is also a factual account of my meeting, to quell any rumors. It is many other things as well. However.... something is not right. Ever since my meeting with Kayliss, a mere three hours ago, I have begun to be worried by some things. He said that I would be observed by this.. whatever he is. Perhaps someday I will call him master, and he will teach me whatever particular category of mystic arts he specializes in. I wonder silently, do I WANT that? Do I want to be observed and tested just to see if I'm worthy of his training?

And what of this quest? As a favor to Father Kayliss, I shall do it. It confuses me, however, that the old gnome wants an artifact of some long-dead religion. And that he had never thought that perhaps, those markings on the map he showed me could be other temples and shrines of the same faith? That simply makes no sense; Kayliss is very sharp of wit and should have seen the obvious connection.

But, what if I am already being observed, and tested? What if that was the first test? A sort of entrance requirement, perhaps? I am second guessing myself again. I've been doing that often the past three hours. Now I wonder if my sanity may be taking leave of me. Maybe so. It doesn't really matter anymore, does it?

I take a few minutes to enjoy the simplicity of the pattern of second guessing oneself.

Now that I think of it, I've decided what I should do. I should try, in every way availible to me, to avoid whoever is or will be following me. I will start tonight. I will flee from this Temple of Tarin, from the lifestyle kindly and cruelly denied me, from the sneering faces of the noble-born children who wish to become holy men for political reasons, or just to bless their family to further wealth and success.

-[ I float above, watching the ripples and color of the Ether. Here it is, what I have sought after for so long. It knows not what it is; when it knows, it will be complete. Already it has begun to mature, gnawing through the cocoon of it's host's sanity. While it protected and sheltered from harm, it also sheltered from further insights and potential. It shall no longer shelter it and it shall be vulnerable. If it is destroyed in this process then all shall be lost. I will protect it, my perfection, my prize for over one hundred years of searching. I know better than to try and control it.. I must observe and, if need be, protect. I must not fail! ]-

I have gathered my few personal belongings I have together. A small leather pouch, a hide bound book, and a hunting knife my grandfather gave me. The door opens without sound, and I am outside. A quote came to mind, "In nature there is beauty and power of every sort." I suppressed a shudder. Evil things could lurk in every shadow. I grip the knife awkwardly and pray that I learn quickly should I need to fight for my life.

-[ The mind, like the sword, becomes stronger and more powerful through fire, when correctly applied. He fears for his life, which in truth is of only trivial consequence at the moment. Should the body be destroyed I shall become It's host. It will only be a matter of time before that becomes necessary. Together, It and I shall become more powerful. Some day the basic nature of reality might be bent by our combined will! ]-

Before I finally commit myself to this path, away from the church that has been my haven for so long, I closely examine the maps again. It is, in truth, so very close; according to the scale it might take two days' walk. I realize that I am without a compass, but suddenly I do not need one.

I realize another insight: My destination has chosen to accept me. Never before have I felt a similar sensation. I took a step forward, and I was there. The days of walking I expected, the hardships along the way, all gone. I Am Here

-[ I see nothing. Suddenly, the host of what I seek is gone! I stare at the empty space. My lips move silently in perfect timing with my subtle hand movements. This plane parts, and I step into the rift only to be pushed back. Nothing short of a god should be capable of that! How did he disappear?

I ponder the concept of Kayliss. Something must be done about him. If he wanted that artifact, the host might just get it for him, given the opportunity. That greedy dwarf could wield a power almost as great as a god. I try to quell the greed in my own heart.. but I must, I MUST be the one who helps finish the prophecy. I will carry the torch onward. ]-

The path is rocky, and I feel the entrance is just ahead, maybe a few minutes away. The pulling sensation I feel is incredible, like a hand is guiding my every step and forcing my pace. As I come closer, it is stronger and more powerful.

Suddenly, my path is blocked by a massive slab of granite. Dozens of lines of writing, faded beyond recognition from thousands of years of elemental barrage. I reach out and touch the surface. I am awestruck beyond the understanding of mere words. It is alive. It thinks and feels and understands and is as ancient as the gods and as powerful and -

I touch the ancient runic writing. I feel it again, it is the cosmos, the land, or rather...

One single concept is firmly embedded upon my mind at this point: Substructure. Basic. Fundamental. Quintessential. ......... Prime. Magical forces spring forth from the rock, and I feel at peace. The universe may collapse, but this shall remain. This place, this power. My fingers continue to run across the letters. I feel, I know, I understand, I AM this place. I am a part of it, as it is a part of me. Together we are one. I hear, vaguely, my own voice beginning to chant in a tongue I do not recognize. My mind stores energy, and suddenly I am in a chamber of stone. Voices echo off of the walls, whispering, filled with secrecy and urgency. I step forward and I feel pain beyond my ability to comprehend.

You shall be, I scream in pain and rage, and anguish is replaced with hope. What shall I be? perfect

I smile, and my flesh is stripped away. I retain consciousness throughout. I look down on the now ruined form on the floor, feeling free as I never have before. Insights assault my mind. I see everything, the entire cycle of creation and destruction...Growth and decay Through eternity.

... the understandings of a civilization long past, one that controlled the power of this shrine-I understand. Those that created this place worshipped reality itself. And they once wielded the power to affect it.

And they became Gods. Given time, of course. Many were destroyed and many have been reborn. several shall rise to that pinnacle of power, and command the land, sky, and beyond. Perhaps some day I shall be among those select few.

After several weeks of learning and realearning all that has ever existed, I found it. The artifact that Kayliss had wanted. I now know that any who wish it to be removed from here are motivated by greed; power hungry individuals that have caught wind of that which might satiate that hunger. However, I still feel something for my old friend and once mentor. I speak into the ripples of reality itself, begging for one who is already a god to grant him a chance to redeem himself, or prove himself unworthy. My plea was answered by an incredibly powerful entity, clad in the physical appearance of a man.

"Great one, I ask that he is stripped of his ability and forced to begin anew. Please, offer him a second chance."

The entity before me considered my request for a moment. "He has done wrong, but this was partly due to circumstances he did not forsee. I grant your request if he agrees." It vanished, and a moment later I felt his energies, abilities, and experience being released. I pray he uses this second chance to help in every way he can.

Several months have passed. I have realized that I am not yet ready to understand all of this. The one that had been following me had nearly given up on my ever returning, but still remained ready to recieve me. I shall accept his offer now. I go forth from the temple, the second time I have left what I expected to be my permanent home. I control his mind, and mine, and create the circumstances for my increased growth. My memory shall be repressed until I am ready. I will remember nothing beyond the chamber where I was freed from that corporeal form. My greatest powers will remain dormant until I am prepared to use them.

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